Refractory Adjustments

Does anyone know who the god of jobs would be? I'd like to set up an audience with this diety, please. Ahem AHEM!

Today I had a great interview. It was for a job that, in its description both written and delivered in the interview, could not have been tailored any closer to my person if it was sewn directly onto my body. Confident, perceptive, people-person who can talk - I could stop right there, right? - to and/or train retailers about environmentally positive merchandise and knows how to structure well their own time and environment. With energy.

And it pays more than minimum wage.

Tonight, post-interview and pre-dinner, I am wondering what it would be like to not have to wonder where I'm going to get the money or the ooompf to continue in our sweet yet meager little life, me and the Sash. Life used to be so much "bigger" - me, an upper middle class wife and mom who may have been unhappy, yes, but used to just living however the moment flung her - now a single welfare mother, comparison shopping for toilet paper, calculator in hand for the shampoo aisle, feeling the devil-may-care thrill of buying a quadruple Americano, yes, a fourple, at Diva. No more fighting and fighting and fighting for a new mortgage, to keep the electricity on, to get a scholarship to Hebrew school, to land a job? Wow, it's been a long haul, yes?

However, I think what the fight has been most accurately about is to find a new way of looking at the world. What I've most needed a is new pair of glasses. (Again!)

Picture this...a photo of myself with a caption below - "Self-supporting through her own contributions." WOOT!

I know DSHS would be thrilled to kiss my patoot goodbye. It says a lot about where my life in this economy has taken me, both fiscally and spiritually, when my wants would be pretty much taken care of with simply getting a job that could get me off the dole. And that would be nice.

But with some new glasses, I can see that while this job could mean that, it has the potential to mean much more for me - I couldn't have even dreamed up money AND something I'm already good at AND feeling good about what I'm doing. And I hope I get it.

But if I don't, I've earned these new specs. And through them I already see that there are more things out there than silver and gold. That there are things that fit my new vision of what I really need, and maybe even what I really want.

So, for right now I have to let go and let the next right move make itself known. And we know how good at that I can be. Riiiiiight......?